1. 2. 3. 4.

I’ve been out of my office job for just over two months now, so I thought it was time to review the list I made back in February.
A list which boldly stated what I’d do if I didn’t have a day job.

• Create the already thought out design for Cupcakes and Mace
  I changed my blog theme in April in order to give myself more control, I also added a new header. There are still changes I’d like to make though.
• Read books often
  I haven’t read a single book since I’ve finished work. I read so much online every. single. day. that I feel like I don’t have the time. I’m tempted to try Twilight to see if the book is any better than the movie.
• Spend more time writing posts
  I do spend more time on most of my posts now, just because I can. I have a lot of half done posts and ideas as well, sometimes I’m too tired when it comes time to write something though and I end up writing filler (like this :p).
• Name, tag, and upload all of my photos
  One day I’ll get to it.
• Write to do lists
  I’m the kind of person that loves to plan, loves to prepare, but can’t quite get the same enthusiasm to perform the task.
  I bought a whiteboard and a corkboard, I write lists, I make piles, I plan, and plan, and plan. But I don’t actually finish anything on the list. I have been writing the lists though so I suppose that means this one is done.
• Exercise
  Hahahahahahahahaha
• Bake
  I’ve been putting my limited and lazy baking skills to practice. Today I made courgette and mushroom bread and it is delicious!
• Write letters
  Email is just SO much easier (and free).
• Find the best thrift stores and ask when new stock is put out
  I’ve hardly left the house during the day, let alone been going thrifting.
• Plan outfits
  When you don’t leave the house there is no need to plan an outfit.
• Get more sleep
  This. This! This is something I’ve gotten REAL good at. I sleep as long as I like and wake up refreshed and happy instead of bleary eyed and grumpy. I wake up and pull bake the curtain and get straight up.
  It’s the best feeling.
• Listen to music lots
  I did for the first month, but I haven’t listened to as much this month. The iPod is all the way over there, and my laptop speakers are tinny as fuck.
• Clear out my old clothes
  Must get on to this. It would allow me to use my desk.
• Bask in the glory of having no boss
  There has been much basking in the Cupcake Factory.
• Breathe more fresh air
  I get to enjoy every sunny day. I wake up when the sun is at its peak and wander into the toasty lounge. I open the bedroom window and front door wide and air the house. Its great.
  My skin is much nicer and not as dry now that I’m not stuck inside with aircon all day.
• Make jewellery
  I get real enjoyment out of making pretty things so making jewellery has been one of the few things I’ve been doing.
• Have fun with my “Wreck This Journal”
  Nope.
• Attempt to alter clothes
  Not yet. Though I’m planning on shortening the straps on a dress tomorrow. My size 12 boobs don’t quite match up to my size 13 thighs.
• Play my bass
  The only time either of the guitars get picked up is when one of our musically inclined friends comes over. I’m too impatient for music, if I’m not good after almost a year of weekly lessons I’m done.
• Save money on food
  We definitely haven’t been eating out as often and I don’t buy lunches so money has certainly been saved.
• Use recipes
  Not as much as I would like, but more than when I had a day job.
• Tweet constantly
  I’ve got the tweeting bug. I don’t tweet constantly, but I’m there often, and I’m always reading.
• Find the best photos on Flickr
  I often spend hours at a time finding perfect photos with CC licences for posts. (if you use Flickr you should give your photos a CC licence so they can be shared :])

So there you have it, I’m as lazy as ever, but I’m happy.

Living with a disease like crohns or colitis is hard to explain to many people. Symptoms are often not noticeable on the outside, there are no broken bones or rashes, and weight gain and loss is assumed to be over eating or anorexia.

I was 17 when I was diagnosed with indeterminate colitis, prior to that I had been getting progressively more sick and thin. I thought I was just a typically thin teenager who could eat what they wanted without putting on any weight. I didn’t know what a normal body felt like and so I assumed the grumbly gut was normal. The grumbly gut was around for about 1 and half years before I began spewing and spending so much time on the toilet I needed to go to a doctor and eventually get admitted to hospital.

Now I manage it pretty well with medication. Medication has side effects though. Side effects like a moon face, bad skin, and increased appetite.

And that’s how I went from stick thin teen… To thin young adult with a huge face… To average sized adult with bad skin.

At least I have a chin again now.

• Mini panics when I suddenly think I’ve only got one day left in my weekend till I have to go back to my horrid workplace. Obviously working in a nasty office left deeper scars than I’d realised.
• Finding out I’m a night owl and my body would rather sleep until 2pm and then stay awake till 3am than get up with everyone else.
• Not feeling the need to feed my face constantly. I’m eating probably half of what I was eating when I was in the office. No more eating to cure the boredom, no more left over cake in the staffroom. I often have my first meal of the day at about 4pm now. (um, except for last week where I ate almost 3 blocks of chocolate, a box of popcorn, two ice creams, a bag of lollies, cheese and crackers, and fish and chips)
• Becoming a bit of a recluse. I haven’t been leaving the house unless we’ve been invited out somewhere, so I often leave the house only once or twice a week. Many days I live in a dressing gown because I don’t see the point in getting dressed!
• An obsession with the Gilmore Girls. Now that I have no office these ladies are my workmate replacements.
• Wanting to/having the time to bake again.

And some expected side effects: losing the bags under my eyes, not having such dry skin due to air conditioning, being happy!

1. freedom, 2. Life decisions / Decisiones de vida, 3. Green is Beautiful, 4. Feeling Bokeh Today…? ♥

1. Lust when you have sex with someone for the first time.
2. Excitement after getting your first professional job.
3. Relief at handing in your resignation when you’ve realised that being from Generation Y and working for a Baby Boomer boss (or even a traditional Generation X boss) doesn’t always work out so well.
4. Independence when you move out of home.
5. Satisfaction knowing that you’re in charge now, and can eat ice cream for breakfast, lunch, and dinner if you want to.
6. Despair when your first relationship ends.
7. The thrill of winning money while gambling. Could be from poker, horses, at a casino, or something ghastly like a cock fight (hopefully not though).
8. Comfort when you find friends you can tell everything.
9. Confidence when you learn to love your own skin and make the most of what you’ve got.
10. Awe thinking about your mum when you realise she was right about everything.

Going flatting for the first time should be an exciting experience.
Once you’ve moved onto your second or third flat you will begin to learn exactly what you do and don’t want out of a flat and out of your flatmates.

This guide is for first timers that don’t have that experience.

• Number 1 rule – Don’t flat with friends
  Flatting with friends will almost always ruin the friendship on some level. When you have to live with a friend who’s untidy, bad with money, or just has too many strange quirks you will get annoyed.
  The biggest problem with this one is that the annoyances won’t be evident until you’re living together.

  I’ve seen it work. But only with older more experienced flatties who are capable of taking care of themselves.

Get the best place you can afford for happy home living!

• No one living above you – Noise from below you and beside you can be terrible when you’re living in an apartment, but worst of all is the noise from above. With wooden floors you’ll hear every creak and footstep.When all you want is a sleep in on a Saturday morning you’ll dread the day you ever moved into the house where the people above like to vacuum at 8am
• Live with as few people as possible – Lucky for us we are in a position where me and the boy no longer need flatmates. In the end you’ll likely hate having flatmates. They’re great to help you find your feet at first though. As long as you don’t have to share the place with 8 others.
• Boys or girls? – A tough one to get right. Too many girls can cause a bitch fight, but too many boys can a smelly house make. Know who you get along with better or go for an even mix
• Property manager or landlord? – Landlords often lack the organisation or time needed to properly care for their property, or their tenants. This can mean they’re hard to get hold of when things can go wrong; and proper processes aren’t followed when the rent needs to be raised, they want to do a property inspection or when you want your bond paid back. There are some excellent landlords out there, but they are as hard to find as great flatmates.Property managers will have a lot of houses to look after and their business depends on keeping the owner of the house happy. The sheer volume of houses property managers have to deal with everyday can mean they are also hard to get hold of sometimes. They generally know what restrictions are placed on entering a property and the procedures they need to follow along the way. Try to find people that have rented off a particular property manager before to see what their style is.
• Know what your flatmates do for a living
  Before you sign yourself up for your new residence know what hours your flatmates are going to be working. It can be a real pain in the ass when you’ve got 4 people all wanting to use the shower at the same time.
  It an be equally annoying when the bar worker gets home at 3am and slams the front door right next to your bedroom.
• Where is the flat situated?
  Are you happy to live far away from town so you can afford a nicer place? You will have to factor in your travel time everyday.
  We prefer to live within walking distance to town so that we don’t have to rely on public transport.

You’ve found a place you like, and you’ve been accepted as a flatmate (or tenant). What now?

Know exactly where you stand and what is expected of you
You should know the following things, preferably in writing:

• When is the property available?
  What date can you move in?
• Are you a tenant or a flatmate?
  You are a tenant if you have signed the tenancy agreement. This means you are jointly responsible for the flat as a whole (including rent payments) with anyone else who has signed the agreement.

  If you are a flatmate you need to make an agreement with the tenant about your responsibilities and notice requirements. Know what happens if the tenant wants to move out. Does this mean you have to move out too?

• Is it a fixed-term tenancy or a periodic tenancy?
  If it is fixed term understand you may have to move out when the term is up. If the landlord wants fixed term and you don’t you could try arranging it so the lease automatically switches to a periodic tenancy when you’ve done your 6 month/1 year fixed term.
  In New Zealand periodic tenancy requires 3 weeks notice when you want to move out. Your landlord may agree to a shorter time but arrange this before anything is signed.
• How much is the rent?
  Set up an automatic payment so it goes to the right place, on time. Your flat may have a joint account where money for power, phone, internet, food etc goes. Make sure you know what it’s going to cost you.
• How much bond is required?
  Also, when will this be paid out to you? People often move into a flat by taking someones place and make casual arrangements for bond refunds. You may lose your bond if the previous flatmate left with unpaid rent and the landlord claims it.
• Get insurance!
  I don’t know the laws in other countries, but not having insurance in New Zealand could ruin your life.
  When you have contents insurance this should include legal liability insurance. This means if you accidentally cause damage to the property (like burning it down because you left the stove on) your insurance will cover the cost of reparations. Without it you could spend the rest of your life paying off a mortgage you get no benefit from.

The Department of Building and Housing has excellent advice specific to New Zealand law for tenants and landlords through all stages of a tenancy. Unfortunately the Department of Building and Housing can only help with disputes for tenants, your rights are different if you are a flatmate. Make sure you keep a record and receipts of rent payments in case anything goes wrong.

Got questions about going renting for the first time? leave a comment or send me an email.

I’ve known the quote on my side bar from Rita Mae Brown for a while but didn’t actually know who she is. So I decided to investigate.

Rita appears to be an intelligent, super funny, amazing writer. You can tell this just by reading her bio.

She saves animals, and I quote her website, is “hailed as the Mother of the Feminist Movement, the Gay Movement”. And she seems humble to boot.

All in all she sounds like an amazing woman!

The following are some of her quotes (my favourites)

The reward for conformity is that everyone likes you but yourself.

Lead me not into temptation; I can find the way myself.

Pornography exists for the lonesome, the ugly, the fearful – it’s made for the losers.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you.

Virginia Woolf said that writers must be androgynous. I’ll go a step further. You must be bisexual.

HELP! Uploaded by FrizzText on 20 Oct 07, 8.35 NZST.

The big announcement was made today.

What announcement was that you ask?

Well nothing that concerns you much but it concerns me greatly. The new General Managers were announced today.
We’re currently going through a restructuring and therefore most of the people hired this year have been hired as contractors. Therefore we have been lucky (?!?) enough to get to know some of the people who have been made permanent employees…before they were made permanent.

Unfortunately this meant that my team had already decided that if this particular contractor was hired as their permanent GM then they would be leaving.

That was the decision handed down to us today.

I know I cannot work under this woman.

She reminds me of my old boss (the reason I left my last job). She micro-manages and does not realise she’s not an all knowing god and that other people have areas of expertise that she could draw on and use to enhance the company.

So therefore, sooner or later I will be leaving this company in pursuit of more exciting tasks.

What tasks are those you might ask?

Well, hopefully blogging. I HATE applying for jobs and being made to feel like I suck just because someone can talk themselves up better than I can. But I do love blogging and connecting with and help people. So you may be seeing a lot more of me in the next few months.

Any support or advice you can offer would be gratefully appreciated.

What would you like to hear about that you can’t find anywhere else?

I am heading into a very revealing phase of my life. I think I may be heading to the discovery of that holy grail…the true purpose of my life.

The journey of self discovery is being helped along by a couple of successful bloggers, Steve Pavlina and Tina Su. I’m a way off yet but a few articles on their blogs are giving me a lot to think about.

Finding a mission and a purpose

Tina’s entry on Think Simple Now titled Life on Purpose: 15 Questions to Discover Your Personal Mission gives a 15 question guide on how to discover your own mission.

Steve’s entry on StevePavlina.com, How to discover your life purpose in about 20 minutes, is the one I’m really interested in though.

Steve says it’s as easy as heading up a page with the words “What is my true purpose in life?” and then writing. Writing sentences, words, short answers to that question until you find one that makes you cry.
I haven’t got there yet. There have been mini-surges (as Steve calls them) but no crying.
But Steve has something to say to all the people that doubt the merits of the exercise

The exercise is fairly pointless if you don’t take it to completion. You can debate the possible merits of it until you’re blue in the face, but you can’t really gauge what the water is like until you’ve gone for a swim.

I encourage you to go read the post and give it a try. Please let me know how you get on

Do something you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life

That’s going to be a whole let easier to manifest once I’ve realised my purpose, but for now Tina has this advice:

• Have a clear vision of the result you want and why you want it
  It has to be measurable
• Write it down and date it
• Plan the steps
• Take action

Tina has just left her high paying job at Amazon to run her blogs fulltime so I know it CAN work.

Setting my own goals

I would like to be doing something I love, fulltime, that doesn’t feel like work (like blogging) within 2 years time. I’m going to start with a date of June 2009 for the first steps, and as a time for re-evaluation. I have a tendency to get bored with projects after about 6 months, so if I’m still going strong then I will have found myself a winner.

In that time I need to find a niche or purpose to focus on. I’ll need to move from a free blogging platform to something I can wholly own. I will need to monitise and I’ll need to get my name out.

Wish me luck :D

Slightly confusing signs by Rebecca

I need direction.

I’m constantly searching for it in my life but I seem to lack the ability to stay interested in any one thing for a period of more than 6 months to a year.

I realised this first when I left school half way through 6th form. I had decided I was going to do something with computers and got myself accepted to the Waikato Polytech with big ideas.

Luckily the course I did was only 6 months long because by the end of it I’d really had enough of sitting in a class room, even if it was hands on.

Then I moved to Wellington with my partner and got sick.

It was just over a year later that I realised I might actually want to go to university.

I had been reading my old maths books (?!) and was quite interested in pharmaceuticals and thought I might like to be a pharmacist. But, because I had left school with nothing but School Cert I wasn’t going to be able to get into University until I was at least 20.

So I did Victoria University’s Certificate of University Proficiency, which is pretty much University Entrance.

I really shouldn’t have been that surprised that by the end of this 6 month course I couldn’t face 3 years of study and so instead I got a job.

Wanting it all right now

It comes down to being from Generation Y. We want it all, right now and we assume that if we are good at what we do we will reap the rewards automatically. I want to do things my way. I want to minimise the use of paper. I want to be relaxed in my surroundings. Unfortunately our bosses are not of the same generation and often value long term commitment, age and ‘the boys club’ a lot higher.

Having only worked in office’s in the public sector I can’t be sure that’s true throughout though.

So what now?

My love of surveys, personality tests and divining all stem from my need for answers. Answers to questions like what makes me unique and what should I do with my life? I know it sounds overly cheesy but I want to be special! :D

As of now this blog is my project. Who knows, I may fail and get bored in a years time (like the bass lessons I took, and the languages I want to learn). Or I may find my direction in life. Two blog posts I stumbled upon today may provide another step in the path “The World’s Largest Blog Niche and Topic Idea List” and “How to Choose the Perfect Blogging Topic”.

I love music, design, television, movies, food, photos, writing (which funnily enough I hated at school but always got good marks in), I have a special interest in colitis due to my illness, I’m alternative in my approach to fashion and I’m a bit of a greeny/human rights/animal rights supporter.

Any ideas?

I’ll take all the help I can get.

Unfortunately last night I couldn’t hold it in any longer and had to ask my partner of almost 6 years (living together the same amount of time) what we are doing.

It was hard, I told him maybe we should break up, even though that’s the last thing I want.
Thing is, even though I’m only 22 now (he’s 24) I’ve know for a few years that he’s the one I want to spend my life with. He, unfortunately, is not sure of the same.
He tells me he doesn’t want to break up with me but I don’t see how we can be together that long and he STILL doesn’t know if I’m the one. If he’s unsure, that to me says very clearly that I am not the one.

So what other option is there. Do I wait another 5 years, be miserable, continue auditioning for the role of little wife while not feeling good enough, and miss any opportunities to meet a man who will treat me like a queen and be so in love he won’t take no for an answer after his romantic proposal – all the while never knowing if after the next 5 years he will ever be sure that I’m the one?

Or do I make the break now, be completely devastated, move, divide our stuff, live with other people, but give myself a better chance at long term happiness?